I have noticed a theme running through several of today's posts calling out folks who have "disappeared" from blogland and/or the need/want to unfollow bloggers.
Right or wrong, I really took these personally, but I always do. I am totally "Little Miss Guilty Conscience" like that -- I am always convinced that I am the offending party and that anonymous complaints are always aimed directly at me.
I am totally guilty of bailing on blogland but the truth is that I am a total disaster. My life has been turned upside down lately and I don't know if I am coming or going. I am stuck in a holding pattern where all I can do is sit here and be stressed out, confused, and miserable.
Many of you might say, "Why don't you talk it out on your blog?" Well, honestly, because I am not ready to talk. Because talking about something makes it real -- it puts it out into the world. So then not only do I have to contend with my own swirl of mixed up emotions I also have to contend with the insecurity that comes from exposing my issues to others.
I also don't feel right putting my hard times out on my blog and seeking support through it when I know that right now I don't have the emotional energy to give support back to others. I am swimming in stress and negativity and I really don't want to put that out into blogland because that doesn't do anything for anybody.
So I have become a hermit. I have pulled my head inside my shell and I have turtled and there may or may not be lots of chips and cookies with me inside my shell.